Book Review: Personal Development for Smart People

October 30th, 2008

I was inspired a little under a year ago to take a lot of the info and techniques I was already developing and sharing online anyway, and create the Beyond Within blog as one of my main contributions to this newly conceived site. A large part of that inspiration, from intial concept to countless useful pointers to help in its successful execution, came from Steve Pavlina. More recently when I learned Steve was offering copies of his new book (aff) in exchange for reviews, I immediately said “sign me up!”

Personal Development for Smart People: The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth (aff)

Before I delve into the meat of the book itself, I should say that in my observation, Steve and I approach the subject matter from angles that are different enough to be worth a mention, because this is naturally going to influence my perception of his book. Steve has identified himself as a lightworker; i.e. one who is polarized toward the light end of the spectrum. My personal path is one of balance, where “light” and “dark” are acknowledged as neutral forces of nature, and integrating them to compliment rather than oppose each other; finding healthy ways to incorporate them as they are rather than trying to change or eliminate either. Two completely valid paths, but they will naturally give rise to differences in philosophy, approach and personal experience.

That aside, my definition of a “great book” is one that makes me go “yes! YES! OH GOD YES!!” in some places, “Argh! No! GAHHH!” in others, presents old concepts in new ways, and offers me practical information I can use in my everyday life. I want something I can wrestle with and make it my own; not accept verbatim as the Gospel Truth™. I found all of the above here, so I’d say we have a winner. That actually sounds like a good way to structure this review to me, so onward we go!

Yes! YES! OH GOD YES!!

Steve starts early in the book by observing the major shortcomings of much of the personal development field as a whole: it’s a cacophony of ideas, philosophies and approaches; many of which completely contradict each other, and can easily make for a big mess if one takes in a bunch of it and then attempts to make some sense of it all. So, rather than starting with techniques, Pavlina breaks personal development down into seven universal principles as the foundation upon which to build an approach that’s consistent and effective, which the techniques naturally arise from. These are Truth, Love, Power, Oneness, Authority, Courage and Intelligence. This was interestingly synchronistic for me, as I had begun considering and working with universal principles a lot lately myself. My own list is slightly different from Pavlina’s, which may amount to a simple difference in personal style — but the concept itself is great, and extremely valid. It also scores points with me because it reminds me of a Gnostic cosmology, where Aeons, who are associated with specific principles, arise from the original Source in a progressive series of emanations. But I’ll save my theological geekdom for another time, other than to say this touches on some very powerful, archetypal stuff.

Pavlina’s approach is simultaneously hard-hitting, no-nonsense, humorous and unorthodox. There’s no rehashing of familiar ground or filler material here: he would rather dive in and tackle the big questions head on, grab fear by the throat and unceremoniously toss it out the window, challenge you to do the same (albeit at your own pace, as long as you’re moving) and give you more than a few creative ideas for getting started. I don’t know if Pavlina would put it in the same terms I would, but he demonstrates a strong understanding of the fact that this universe is one of probabilities, not absolutes, so we might as well embrace uncertainty, figure out how to influence those probabilities in our favor, and otherwise enjoy the ride.

Steve’s healthy appreciation for unorthodoxy especially appeals to me. I’m a firm believer in doing what works — with the caveat that a lot of “what works” is found outside of “conventional wisdom,” and can only be discovered by being willing to step outside our comfort zones and think outside the box. The list of 66 succinct (and amusingly titled) tips for increasing one’s effectiveness reflects this. One is encouraged to try everything from practicing a steely glare (which I’ve long called The Look™, and can personally vouch for) to use on people who interrupt your established work-time, to simply finding ways to irritate the crap out of yourself until you cave in and address tedious tasks. On that note, after merely reading this book I may in fact be incapable of procrastinating now, because every time I try, I can’t help but picture a little Steve Pavlina on my shoulder, poking me in the head and going “do it now! do it now!” until I relent. *twitch*

Argh! No! GAHHH!

Like many lightworkers, Steve’s book places a heavy emphasis on the concept of oneness. While oneness is a great concept, in my own development I’ve found a need to seriously refine and in some cases abandon my approach and shift my understanding of this subject away from the views reflected in this book and elsewhere.

I know a lot of my readers come here for help and information after finding themselves unwittingly targetted by some pretty sadistic elements of creation. So, I’m offering this as an important point to bear in mind for anyone who shares my understanding of this subject, but can otherwise benefit from this book. Pavlina challenges us to connect with others and love boldly, which is admirable. Due to my experiences however, any approach I use toward that end would have to account for the existence of personalities in this world who literally lack the capacity for things like love, emotion and conscience, and are not known to be “curable” in that regard. In psych literature these people are called psychopaths; metaphysically speaking, there are people (and entities) who have been clairvoyantly observed as missing their heart chakras — the nonphysical organ which ideally processes love energy and forms healthy connections with others. I elaborated more on my approach to this subject in a recent post, but the gist of it is: love freely and boldly by all means, but use discernment. This is a matter of practicality rather than fear; forcing a gift upon someone who has no way to use it simply wastes my resources, does them no good, and likely invites something into my space that’s going to be a lot harder to get rid of than it was to invite in, thus limiting the resources I have to give to those who can make good use of them. Thankfully one’s probability of meeting such a character is relatively slim (especially if one operates from further down the light side of the spectrum where it’s even less likely to be encountered). But for anyone who is already IN that situation, the most common approach to unconditional love and oneness will not help to resolve the issue, and may compound the problem.

In some places, what Steve intends as “hard-hitting motivation” gets a bit too close to “merciless,” and whether one finds this motivating or discouraging will depend largely on where the individual is currently at in their development. For example, at one point we’re encouraged to rate various areas of our life on a scale of 1-10. Totally with him there; self-evaluation is a crucial part of any personal development regimen. However, he then suggests we change anything 7 and under to a 1; either you’re where you want to be or you’re not. I appreciate what he’s getting at here, but I also know what it’s like to be in a position where the first challenge of the day is finding a good reason to get out of bed, and having that in itself feel like a major achievement. If you start out at a 1, working your way to a 5 is something to smile about and celebrate — but definitely keep pushing for that 10! On the other hand, Steve opts for a more moderate “go at your own pace” approach elsewhere, so this may simply be a matter of offering a wide variety of possible styles to reach the largest number of diverse individuals.

The only other caveats that come to mind have to do with Pavlina’s approach to self-expression. If I’m understanding him correctly he seems to advocate being your full self and speaking ALL your truth no matter what — in one instance recommending we “make [ourselves] naked to the world.” Again, lots of validity here, but with reservations. As I progress further along my own path, I find myself becoming simultaneously bolder and more open in what I’m willing to share — yet more discerning about who I will share it with, and how I will express myself in a given situation. I’m working to find the ideal balance for myself on this front, though I’m still much more likely to show my love by buying you a beer and enjoying a great conversation and a lot of laughs, than by hugging strangers on the street. That aside, I’m totally with Pavlina in the spirit of what he’s trying to accomplish here, which is to challenge us to set aside the usual social fears and connect with each other in freedom and love. People in general are too afraid of each other, and the world needs more people willing to break down the artificial walls we’ve built up between ourselves.

Lastly, one thing caught my eye, and it seems fitting to use it as an opportunity to offer something from my own work back to Steve, for all the benefit I’ve gotten out of his.

“Sometimes I wish I could go back in time, give my past self a big hug, and tell him how much I appreciate what he did for me. If he hadn’t persisted through those difficult times, I’d never have been able to succeed in business, nor would I be able to share what I learned.”

You can. And probably have. What do you think was keeping you going, if not your choice to connect to that future probable-self out of all other possibilities, and him simultaneously reaching backward to confirm his existence? This is one area where I do expand my concept of oneness well beyond the usual model, to include past and future — or rather, the probable past and future selves I choose to associate with in my own present. Pale-fucius say: after all, what is all this personal development, without a future self to enjoy its fruits?